If you want to be in a relationship, odds are you're also looking for a partner who is at minimum kind, respectful, and a good fit for you, and to be in a relationship that builds you up and makes you happy. But you also can't really plan who you'll fall in love with, and sometimes, it's hard to tell when someone you're dating is being genuine. Unfortunately, that means that you might end up in a situation where you love someone who isn't good for you. It's not your fault, and we've all been there at some point or another.
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Or would it be a waste of time? We have an overwhelming fear of uncertainty. Not only that, we want to know where we stand, and where things are going. The desire to not waste your time, and energy is valid. Dating someone who wastes your time is like a driver that knows your destination, and agrees to take you there, but never puts the car in drive. So how can you date more effectively and avoid wasting your time with the wrong person?
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When thinking about your future, you have to remember to try and include them in it instead of automatically including them without even thinking about it. You feel relieved when they have to cancel plans and you get to hang out by yourself or with your friends instead. Instead, you feel like you could just stay in your current situation forever and neither one of you would care or notice. Being with them causes you to grow increasingly insecure, instead of the other way around.
For the most part, you can't really choose who you happen to fall in love with. You can definitely choose what you want to do with those feelings, but you can't force yourself to have feelings for someone and you can't really force yourself to stop. As a result, it's so easy to find yourself in a situation where you've fallen in love with the wrong person.